Gregg Shorthand - Basic Principles of Gregg Shorthand by John Robert Gregg

Author:John Robert Gregg [Gregg, John Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

79

like brown lace over the cliff-slope,” is neither here nor there. A girl who could

evoke “Klepslap” is capable of great things. The man told her so when he dis-

charged her, feeling, as he did so, that the universal-language people needed her

badly.

The question of international alliances must have been humming in the ears of

the girl above the keys when she caused “On account of this, Ethel’s life was

marred for all time,” to appear, “On a Count of those, Ethel’s love was married for

ill times.”

Occasionally a new beast or bird is discovered by the typewriter, thus: “The

sea-quail was, etc.,” the intention being, “The sequel was, etc.” This was in line

with a blunder made by the same girl, who avowed that a “gull sunk the

schooner,” instead of “a gale.” On another occasion she declared that a pair of

lovers “hatched up a pretty squirrel,” instead of their having “patched up a petty

quarrel.”

Having confessed that once upon a time she had been a waitress in a popular

restaurant, the reason is clear why “Foist the males of the dynasty” was clicked out,

“first, the meals of the dinnersty.” This sounds like a “made-up,” but it is a fearful

fact.

“The President was heard with acclaim,” dictated the man. “The present was

hard with clam,” was what the typewriter insisted he had said, as she tearfully

hunted for her notes.

In some stenographic systems an arbitrary sign may stand for one, two, or

even three words. Sometimes, the mistranslation of one of these signs leads to

funny results. For instance, it was toward the end of a love story, and the girl was

expressing herself as tired of her narrow round of duties and wanting an opportu-

nity in life. To this the so-far-undeclared youth ought to have replied according

to the dictation of the man, “Alice, let me be your opportunity!” But the gramma-

logues for “particular” and opportunity ‘were the same in the system used by the

man’s stenographer, and so she made Edwin plead, “Alice, let me be your particu-

lar.”

Because of the droll typewritten truth of the assertion that “He is the sawed-off

man that one instinctively books down upon,” the departure from the original,

which was, “He is the sort of man one instinctively hooks down upon,” was for-

given.

During a political campaign the man dictated, “The chattering policy of the

party is of an amazing sort. Irresponsible talk seems to have taken the place of

concerted action, so far as the leaders are concerned.” But, according to the type-

writer, he had declared, “The chattering Pollies of the party is of an amazing

sort. Irresponsible tick seems to have taken the place of concerted coin, as far as

the leaders are concerned.” He had to admit that his employee had unknowingly

written much truth.

80

A bright-haired, bonnie-faced girl, with a whole stack of diplomas and refer-

ences, held a position with the man for one day. Seventy times and seven, more or

less, did he forgive her blunders during that day; but when, toward evening, he

spake, “Fate creeps slowly along Time’s corridors,” and she made it appear, “Feet

creep slyly along Tom’s car-doors,” it was too much.

In another

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